<?php
/**
 * <https://y.st./>
 * Copyright © 2016 Alex Yst <mailto:copyright@y.st>
 * 
 * This program is free software: you can redistribute it and/or modify
 * it under the terms of the GNU General Public License as published by
 * the Free Software Foundation, either version 3 of the License, or
 * (at your option) any later version.
 * 
 * This program is distributed in the hope that it will be useful,
 * but WITHOUT ANY WARRANTY; without even the implied warranty of
 * MERCHANTABILITY or FITNESS FOR A PARTICULAR PURPOSE. See the
 * GNU General Public License for more details.
 * 
 * You should have received a copy of the GNU General Public License
 * along with this program. If not, see <https://www.gnu.org./licenses/>.
**/

$xhtml = array(
	'<{title}>' => 'Rescuing a crushed hose, cleaning an upholstered chair, and attempting to set up a Wi-Fi dongle',
	'<{body}>' => <<<END
<p>
	I am not comfortable borrowing items from people without their knowledge and without their permission.
	I spotted a hose trapped under the fallen tree and vines in the back yard yesterday while I was power washing, so I made it my goal for the day to rescue the hose and prevent the further need to jack my father&apos;s hose.
	It turns out that a large branch that was supporting the tree was lying right on top of the hose, crushing it, so I feared that the hose would have become too leaky to be of any good.
	Once the hose was free, I hooked it up to the power washer to find out how damaged the hose actually was, and found that it&apos;d survived remarkably well; the water pressure restored the hose&apos;s rightful shape and no visible leaking occurred.
	I think that the tree actually protected the hose more than it harmed it, blocking the sun&apos;s destructive rays from hitting the hose nearly as much as they otherwise would have.
	With everything working correctly, I finished power washing the back porch.
</p>
<p>
	Vanessa cut themself shaving, but didn&apos;t notice until they&apos;d bled on our mother&apos;s new second-hand chair.
	They tried to clean it off, but that didn&apos;t co as expected, as attempting to clean off the blood spots only made them that much larger.
	They had me take a look, and much to our surprise, the upholstered chair was actually covered in an unnoticeable layer of dirt.
	The large spots on the chair weren&apos;t smeared blood - they were clean spots! Vanessa worried that our mother might have wanted the chair to be the color that they&apos;d purchased the chair as, but neither of us had any way to revert the chair to it&apos;s former state.
	I scrubbed the rest of the chair to make the whole thing clean, thereby removing the spots.
	As I though, our mother wasn&apos;t upset about the color change when they got home, but they also didn&apos;t go take a look at it.
	Still, clean is better than dirty, so I never expected there to be a problem.
</p>
<p>
	Our mother liked the school in Salem.
	They really want to live in Salem, saying that Salem has the same feel as Springfield but is a bit further from our father.
</p>
<p>
	Vanessa, our mother, and I headed to the store to get a Wi-Fi dongle for our mother, as apparently, they apparently understand the concept of Wi-Fi dongles better than Wi-Fi cards.
	The Wi-Fi card is of course a much better option, as that option doesn&apos;t involve blocking the laptop&apos;s one and only $a[USB] port and the Wi-Fi card slot probably offers better speeds than the $a[USB] port, but once our mother gets strange ideas in their head, there&apos;s no arguing with them.
	Quite frankly, I&apos;m not the one dealing with the machine either, so it&apos;s not my problem if my mother wants to go with the more frustrating option.
	Once we had it home, I attempted to set up the Wi-Fi dongle for them, but that didn&apos;t go well.
	First, the Wi-Fi dongle insisted that it required a Windows update before it&apos;d support encrypted Wi-Fi networks.
	This machine&apos;s running Windows XP, I&apos;m not even sure if such an update even still exists.
	After much frustration, I managed to get Java and Android tools set up, but $a[ADB] refused to cooperate.
	With no pseudo-tethering and no Wi-Fi, I wasn&apos;t able to even try to update the machine and had to give up for the night.
	I also tried setting up my own supposedly-free Wi-Fi dongle on the machine, but even with the driver installed, the machine doesn&apos;t seem to recognize the hardware.
	Our mother says that there&apos;s an open Wi-Fi access point at the corner of our block, so I&apos;ll try using it to update the machine in the morning.
</p>
END
);
